I can’t make heads or tails of it. One night I’m dreaming about candy covered cake, and the next I’m having nightmares. It’s enough to drive a girl crazy! I prefer the confectionary dreams myself – I’ve had quite enough of nightmares, thank you!
So after I woke up at 4 am this morning, I couldn’t go back to sleep. Who could? It was a pretty bad nightmare. I laid there for a while, thinking. And for some reason this little song I learned as a child in Christian school started floating through my mind: “Praise ye the Lord, hallelujah …” It’s been a long time since I’ve been filled with just praise for God. Usually I’m simply a beggar. Please God, please God! It’s been that way for a long time, and I thought by now He’d be sick of my nagging and would say yes to my pleas just to get me to quit bothering Him. But no. No blessing for the Falcon. Yeah, I can talk about crisis of faith. I’ve learned a lot in the last few years. I can relate to Job in quite a number of ways, more-so than I ever wanted to relate to any Biblical person. I don’t know if there’s been some sort of spiritual significance in the things I’ve faced, but I have learned that sometimes crap just happens that has nothing to do with God. It seems that typically our first instinct is to blame Him for anything bad that happens in our life, an accusation He doesn’t deserve.
Anyway, the praise. For hours that little song just filled my spirit, and in many ways it felt like being washed. Clean. God is good. Life may be frightening in many respects, but God is still God and He is good.
After a few hours I was able to fall back to sleep, and it was a good sleep. The baby slept all night too, so maybe we’re making progress. 
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