Well, strings of them actually.
It’s an established fact that one of the biggest reasons why I refuse to get a real tree at Christmas is because of the lights. I tried it a couple of times, the last time as a young adult, and I swore, never again! Not that I don’t adore the wonderful fragrance of real Christmas trees, oh I love it lots. But I hate the needles and I hate the sap and I feel guilty and I hate the needles, and let’s not forget the awful, stabbing needles! I remember still vacuuming them up in the summer when I was a teen and my mother had gotten a real tree for some reason the previous Christmas.
So, I don’t do the Christmas tree lights. Honestly, my way of doing the lights even on a fake tree is to take the whole pile of wires and just kind of toss the mess at the tree like a bridal bouquet. Catch, Tree! Which drives my husband absolutely insane. We both tend to be perfectionists and mostly in similar areas, but this is one where we’re polar opposites. He loves Rockwell-esque Christmas tree perfection and I’m more of a “no worries, nobody will see that side anyway” kind of tree decorator.
But this is why we get pre-lit trees. No muss, no fuss. Years ago, when we had a big tree, I used to just put it in a giant mattress storage bag, lights, ornaments, tinsel and all, and just haul the thing out to the garage. Easy-peasy!
This spring however, we were able to put up an Easter tree, using one of the little colored Christmas trees we picked up last winter. I took it out of the box and set it on a bookcase and when Darc got home, the first thing he said was, “Did you do the lights? That looks horrible!” To which I replied, “I don’t do lights, remember? That’s how it came out of the box.”
So, the following weekend, he proceeded to remove the lights from the tree to re-do them the right way. And I have to say, it was the weirdest strand of lights we’ve ever seen in our lives. It was basically 2 loops, one slightly larger than the other, with a plug. There was no beginning or end, it was just these 2 loops. What the … how are we supposed to work with that? Well, him, not me! I didn’t even supervise!
It must have taken him over an hour to get the lights back on. The kids may or may not have learned a new colorful word or two. It was one of those projects that should have been short and sweet, but became frustrating and tedious. All for just a few lights on a little tree!
But who makes loops of lights? It even sounds weird. Light loops. Loopy lights. Looped lights. *sigh* Just plain weird. I get loopy just thinking about it!
Anyway, the lights got done eventually, all by Darc, all by himself, with no help from me. Because, you know, I don’t do lights*. And the kids and I got the tree decorated in time for Easter. Yay!
*But I will do windows. Occasionally.