Chicago Cops Think This Sucks!

I got an email from one of my BFF’s over the weekend.  She knows about my, uh, thing about Chicago, so if she comes across an article she thinks might interest me, she’ll drop me a line.  This is the most recent one I got from her:

“CHICAGO — A 14-year-old aspiring police officer donned a uniform, walked into a Chicago police station and managed to get an assignment — patroling in a squad car for five hours before he was detected, police said Sunday.

The boy did not have a gun, never issued any tickets and didn’t drive the squad car, Deputy Superintendent Daniel Dugan said.

Assistant Superintendent James Jackson said the ruse was discovered only after the boy’s patrol with an actual officer ended Saturday. Officers noticed his uniform lacked a star that is part of the regulation uniform.

Police said they were investigating how the deception went undetected for so long in what they described as a serious security breach.

Police didn’t identify the boy because of his age. He has been charged as a juvenile with impersonating an officer.

Dugan said the boy looks older than 14 and was motivated by a desire to be an officer, not malice or “ill intent.”

The boy once took part in a Chicago program for youth interested in policing, so he would have been familiar with some procedures, perhaps helping him blend in, police spokeswoman Monique Bond said.”

I have copied the article in full, but if you want to read it yourself, here’s the link.  Teen dupes police, patrols Chicago for 5 hours

So the kid sits in the squad car, with another cop, who doesn’t get a clue for 5 hours that this is a 14 year old kid impersonating a cop?  Holy Toledo, Batman!  What if this hadn’t been a kid who wanted to be a cop when he grows up?  What if this had been some kind of bad guy with a gun tucked into his boot?  I swear, Chicago cops make the Keystone cops look like absolute pros.  Yep, our tax dollars, highest tax dollars in the nation, at work.

Chicago Withdrawal

I’ve been debating for a while now, whether or not to do this post.  When JR decided to close down and delete his blog, he wanted to go quietly, with no fanfare.  Since that time however, I’ve gotten several searches on my own blog, of people looking for Chicago Withdrawal.  I figured it was time to talk about it. 

JR felt that his blog was not representative of who he is as a person.  He felt it was a focus on one small part of him, something he was working through.  He’s worked through it now, and decided to delete the blog for several reasons, some of them personal.  He said what he needed to say, got it off his chest, and he’s pretty much moved on now.  Will he blog again in the future?  At this time, he’s fairly certain the answer to that is, “No,” but he’s reserved the right to change his mind if the urge strikes him.  So, Chicago Withdrawal is gone.  However, JR still stops by from time to time to say hello and see what’s new.  I’m sure he’d love to hear from you, so the comments section is open, if you’d like to tell him “hi.”  🙂

Now, I found a couple of links for you fans of my Chicago Sucks post.  I just had to share. 

Best Cities For Jobs In 2008 – Obviously this one lists the best cities for jobs in 2008 … oh … wait.  Chicago’s NOT on this list!  Hmmm, let me try again.

Best Cities to Live, Work and Play – This one too is pretty obvious.  Oh no, Chicago’s NOT on this one either! 

I guess it really does suck to live in Chicago.  But then, we already knew that, didn’t we.  😉

Chicago “Considering” Sucks

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

Daley considering increased taxes  This is the headline I saw a couple of days ago in my online paper.  I had to laugh.  So, Daley’s “considering” raising taxes?  In nearly 20 years, when has Daley ever “considered” raising taxes and then decided not to?  Hmm?  Anyone?  Chicago already has the highest tax rates in the country, and now they’re going to go up some more, on lots of other things.  Cubs, Sox, Bears, Bulls, and Blackhawks fans, grab your wallets for you’re HIGH on the list, since Daley’s got an increase in “taxing major sports events” in mind.  I know Bears fans are loyal, but I foresee some games blacked out in the future.  Because the tax on parking’s going up too.  Oh, won’t be driving to the games?  Don’t worry, CTA fares are increasing also.  And don’t think you’re exempt from the tax either, music lovers!  Live music shows are getting the extra taxation too. 

But don’t worry, maybe Daley can go on the road with his new comedy act.  I’m serious!  He should think about it!  This is what he said!  “Daley said he always tries to better manage his government before turning to taxpayers.”  Have you ever heard anything funnier in your life?

Chicago Sucks for the stressed!

Oh you KNOW I was ROFLMAO Wednesday when THIS news came out!  –>> Forbes ranks Chicago most stressful city  Thank you Forbes, for once again stating what I’ve been saying for years!  (Here’s the complete list)  And you know I laughed so hard, reading through comments on blogs, people denying that they’re stressed living in Chicago.  “We’re NOT stressed here!  *snarl* N-N-N-New YORK is WAY more stressful than Chicago is!  There’s no WAY we’re more stressed than New York!  Not in a million years!!”  So went the basic attitude.  Can you feel the air vibrating with my vindication?  And all my blogulars, over on my Why I Think Chicago Sucks post are feelin’ it too, I have no doubt! 

Listen Chicago, you have always wanted to be better than New York at something, here’s your chance!  Now you are, and you’re complaining about it?  *shaking head*  Fickle city, you are never pleased. 

We’re #1!  We’re #1!  Highest Taxes in the country, and now Most Stressed in the country.  Hmm … see any connection?  Maybe?  Just a thought.  New York, we’re gainin’ on ya!  Woo!  😉

 

No job? No money? No clean air? No problem.

©DarcsFalcon

Why Do YOU Think Chicago Sucks?

Image via Wikipedia

A few days ago, one of my blogulars over on my “Why I think Chicago Sucks” post asked if I would do a special section. 

Lost In Chicago Says:
Do you think you could create a topic on this blog dedicated to silly little and large things that are annoying and suck?  A list of little things that simply do not make any sense yet exist in Chicago and NOBODY EVER COMPLAINS.

I told him I would give it a shot and this is what I’ve come up with.  Mostly I’m just copying what he suggested.  🙂

Don’t forget, I also have my Anti-Chicago page where you can find links to all of my Chicago posts.  🙂

So here it is, a post for you to comment on all those annoyances about life in Chicagoland.  And let me be clear here.  This is a post EXPRESSLY for those things that annoy people in Chicagoland who have to deal with them.  Any people who come here and think they need to “defend Chicago” or “just feel like arguing” will be summarily deleted.  No exceptions.  If you don’t think Chicago Sucks, DO NOT COMMENT.  This is not a public forum, it is MY forum and those are my rules.  Clear?  Good!  😀

To get things started, Lost had a couple of suggestions:

– Chicago L-train cars have doors opening to the inside instead to the sides so they take the available space away and you can actually get hit by them

– L-train cars lack a horizontal rail so there is nothing you can easily hold on to it while standing during rush-hour

– Chicago employs people to direct the traffic at busy intersections in addition to working traffic lights, for some reason it is always a pair of city workers and they are poorly trained so they seem to create more havoc.

– Chicago’s Metra stations do not have ticket machines so there are long lines to available manned ticket windows. Metra by the way does not accept credit cards as a form of payment, they do accept checks though…

And Darcknyt followed up with a few of his own:

– How ’bout bus lines that don’t go anywhere you need to go at any time you need to go? (More true in the ‘burbs, I guess, but still annoying.) Metra not taking credit cards is a BIG one. How ’bout trains with a schedule that are NEVER ON TIME?? (I’ve been riding since March and have not ONCE been picked up at the scheduled time.)

– How ’bout cabbies that are willing to run down pedestrians so they can get to a curb where NO ONE is waiting for a cab?? WTF?? And blow by a cop standing in the street directing traffic to do so!

– Or people ignoring yellow lights and again endangering pedestrians? Don’t pedestrians have the right-of-way in ALL situations?? How ’bout enforcing some of this sh*t??

– How about giving CABBIES tickets for driving like assh*les, speeding and recklessly operating their vehicles?

Bookmark this page, so any time one of those irritating things bugs you and you need to rant, you can hop online and tell us about it.  🙂  Ready?  Set?  Comment!

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I Still Think Chicago Sucks

America’s Top 10 Most Expensive Cities – Yep, made the most expensive list.  And we’re not even on a coast!

 

Top 10 Best American Cities To Buy A Home – Whoops!  Sorry!  Chicago is NOT on this list!  It’s not one of the best places to buy a home, it’s just expensive.  And miserable. 

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I’m including the whole Q/A thing from Dear Abby here, for the simple fact that the person who wrote it works in … you guessed it, Illinois!  No doubt this happens in many places, but I was struck by the fact that the IL writer said it happened often.  What kind of jerk locks their pet in a home they’re abandoning?  Apparently an Illinois jerk.

DEAR ABBY: I work for a major lending company and have cleaned out foreclosed homes. Too many times, I find animals who have died from exposure or literally starved to death.
My message to homeowners is: PLEASE make arrangements for your pets if you can’t take them with you. Once a loan company notifies you of foreclosure, it can be many weeks before someone enters that home. Give your pet a fighting chance! — DISCOURAGED IN ILLINOIS

DEAR DISCOURAGED: I’m pleased to pass along your important message. If living arrangements change, your family pet should not be abandoned or dumped to fend for itself. Contact a rescue group so the animal can be placed for adoption with another pet lover or a shelter.

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Compared with other cities, ours is a can’t-do place – “The Windy City Nanny State”

R U ambu-textrous? – Chicago thinks you’re too dumb to text and walk at the same time!

Illinois ranks 43rd for number of black male students graduating from high school – This is just sad!  Why does our education suck so much?

The $20,000 question – Well, this might be one reason ….

Meeks seek aldermanic support for protest – So it’s a good idea to encourage students not to go to school? 

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Clout keeps power on – It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.

A Chicago Operation from Top to Bottom – Which is why Obama knows Daley.  Do you really want the corruption of Chicago politics in the White House?

Daley gives ward supers raise while asking unions for sacrifices – And retroactive raises at that – isn’t that nice???

Governor’s vetoes cut funds to fight wrongful convictions – Do NOT get wrongfully convicted for a crime in Illinois!

Cutbacks, layoffs dog Chicago financial industry – Don’t come here looking for work!  We’re expensive, miserable, and short on jobs.

Illinois unemployment increases to 7.3 percent – Yeah, business sure is booming, isn’t it. 

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Illinois State Police advice to women who are attacked by criminals – They hand out popsicle sticks and tell you to throw up.  Srsly.  Gives whole new meaning to the term, “Gag me!”

Daley promises to fight to keep handgun ban – When guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns.

Morton Grove repeals 27-year-old gun ban – Finally!  A breath of fresh air after nearly 3 decades!

Wilmette repeals town’s handgun ban after high court ruling – Oh!  You mean the 2nd Amendment applies to the people??

Evanston latest suburb to repeal handgun ban in wake of high court ruling – Another one bites the dust! 

Of course it’s fair that they have guns and you don’t – Fear the government that fears your guns!

Is Chicago the source of Toronto’s guns? – Of course!  Since we can’t have them here, might as well ship them up north!

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Monster trains coming down the tracks? – You’ve heard Chicagoland was a railroad hub, right?

Motorists to pay freight – And expect to wait even longer at those train crossings too … I mean really wait.  And wait.  And wait.  Oh, you died?  Well, your ambulance was held up at the train crossing.  Thanks Canadian National!

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White Sox fan beat by Cubs fans, loses eye – Cubs fans get pissy when you say, “1908.” 

2 Cubs fans charged in beatdown of Brewers fan – And this was after the Cubs won a game!  One guy even hit his own sister when she tried to stop the fight!

Two Cubs fans to stand trial in Wisconsin for beating Brewers fan – We’ll see how well folks in Wisconsin take to the beating of one of their own by thugs from Chicago. 

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A few links my friend in Texas sent me – thanks Raga!  *hugs*

Chicago Sucks Women’s Cut T-Shirt

Chicago Sucks BBQ Apron

Chicago Sucks Jersey

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And finally, I find it amusing that in Illinois, even fewer than average consider the Bible to be literal, and also in Illinois, fewer than average report having their prayers answered.  Coincidence?  😉

 

Faith in Illinois

June 24, 2008

On many questions of faith, Illinois closely resembled the national profile in a new poll that takes an in-depth look at Americans’ religious beliefs. But Illinoisans were less likely to interpret the Bible literally.
While 33 percent of all respondents said the Scriptures were the "word of God, literally true word for word," only 27 percent of those in Illinois agreed.
Illinoisans were also more likely to agree that "there is more than one true way to interpret the teachings of my religion" and that "many religions can lead to eternal life."
And while Illinoisans pray as frequently as the rest of the country, they were less likely to report receiving answers to those prayers.

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I hope the rest of you in the other 49 states have a great day!  We can’t in IL, we get taxed for it.  Seriously.  It’s called the “amusement tax.”  We can only have okay days, or all right days, but we can’t have great days where we smile and laugh or are amused in any way.  But I still hope the rest of you have a great day – Lord knows someone ought to be able to!  😉

City of Chicago Amusement Tax: Owners, managers, operators of places where amusements are conducted collect tax from patrons for witnessing or participating in amusements

 

Chicago Still Sucks

Special thanks to a commenter on my Why I Think Chicago Sucks post, who also comments over on my Anti-Chicago bud JR’s blog.  I found the links that RealR had provided, talking about how the crime in Chicago is so bad, the Governor wants to call in the National Guard.   And here you thought we were all just a bunch of paranoid wimps scared of the big, bad, city!  You should check out a video that JR found, showing how one family on vacation to Chicago got a rude awakening one evening when a .45 bullet whizzed through their room and into the room next door.  And this was in the heart of the tourist area, not some slum.  Statistically, crime is up in Chicago – and all those who want to berate us for criticizing the city can’t argue with those facts. 

Nat’l Guard choppers to fight crime in Chicago 

Gov. says Guard, state police may help in Chicago  

Ill. Gov: Chicago May Get Troopers, National Guard

That being said, you may have read my recent post about a little troll problem I had over on my Chicago Sucks post.  He showed up in May, then left after mild type-lashing, only to return about a week ago.  He was respectful and fairly courteous to me personally, but started lashing out against my commenters.  Well.  We can’t have that!  Eventually I asked him to leave and pointed him to WordPress where he could make his own blog and love on Chicago and hate on us all he wanted.  Know what?  He took me up on it, and then invited me over to his blog!  In the process of outing himself though, he’s lost a lot of his credibility, in terms of bashing us Chicago non-lovers.  He’s not been all around the country, as he claimed.  He’s never visited those places he claimed were inferior to Chicago.  He’s a 20/21 year old college student (big surprise!) who moved to Chicagoland just 5 years ago from Indiana and at present, just comes back during summer breaks.  But, he loves Chicago.  I say, “Give it time.”  I used to like Chicago too.  But I was struck with the level of character it took for him to reveal himself in such a way, and invite me over to see.  Most trolls don’t do that – they insult and run.  Franktown owned up to his “trollness” and I admit, I kind of feel like chucking him on the shoulder and saying, “Good one, kid!  You stepped up!”  There’s hope for him after all!

So with that in mind, I’d like to ask you to step on over to my friend JR’s blog, ChicagoWithdrawal.  He’s a nice young man, and he’s not just about Chicago.  He’s also got some interesting dietary, musical, and political thoughts too. 

And while you’re at it, say hello to Franktown too.  He’s new to the blogosphere – in terms of having his own place.  He made a big post asking me for a truce, and I have agreed.  And I’d kind of like him to see that just because we don’t like a lot of the crap that goes on in Chicago and its surroundings, doesn’t mean we’re jerks.  We can be friendly.  Sure we can!  😉